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Hard Day

Today is my first day back to work after spring break, it was so wonderful to have a whole week off. But on the other hand, it has been super hard on me. I’m trying to hard to let go the fact that I get so angry and upset at people who have and keep having children likes it’s no big deal. While I’m over here struggling and have been for 5 years in order to have a baby. Michael and I have been though so much these years and I don’t know why, but I just can’t get over it. I feel like taking to friends and family had not been helping. I sit and think to myself so much and I just want to scream or cry or both when I think about why has it been so hard for us! I already have to accept the fact that I will never be able to carry a pregnacy. That is hard enough to accept, let along think when is the time going to be our time?  I take a deep breath and I feel like I can’t fully take on, my chest is stuck with emotions and in pain. I want this feeling to go away. Tears just fall without it eve
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No baby 

Well, bad news.... no baby this month. We will continue to try and see what happens the second time around. We are going to order sperm again and hopefully this next time is a winner! I will not be updating until we get pregnancy news!  I pray for un update soon! 
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Maybe Baby... 

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Well today we were suppose to know if she was pregnant, but today when she tested it showed negative. Buuuuuut she has not gotten her period yet, and yesterday she has was spotting which could be implantation bleeding, so if that is the case, her pregnacy test would not show negative until after baby is done doing its thing. So about 3-4 days after her spotting HGC level would be high enough to see if she is she is really pregnant.  So the waiting game starts over again.... we will give it a few more days and have her tests again as long as she does not start her period that is.   Keeping a positive thought the baby is just getting ready to make a grand entrance!  Until next time! 
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First Baby Magness Pregnacy Test

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Well I have to post this! This morning Suro mom took the 10 dpo test and it shows to be a good sign! I can’t wait until she takes the next one in the morning. Today at 8am Michael and I received this photo!  So incredible, yet so anxious to see the one tomorrow!! Night! Can’t wait to walk up in the morning! Positive vibes!  We did come up with names for sure Boy- Maximiliano Magness (Max Magness)❤️ Girl- Emilia Magness (Emi Magness) ❤️
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Disneyland with Jew Crew! 

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Now it’s just a on baby to be created! In the mean time, we went to Disneyland with the Jew Crew! Had an amazing time with all of them, got to meet Tina in person! Besides the fact that I got super sick, I had a great time getting to know all of Michael’s sisters.  We had a cook out at the air bnb in Cali then on Sat morning we went to Disneyland!! It was so much fun to see them interact with one another and see them each find someone in common with the other.  I have been so happy the Michael had been able to find more family and for me to have more sister!  During this time baby should be about a week if so, so we are going to start taking early pregnancy test starting tomorrow February 26th! I’m so exited I can’t even think!  I don’t want to get my hopes up to high and it be negative but I also don’t want to think negative and everything work out. I know in the  end everything happens for a reason, and it will work out for us. I know we will have a baby sooner or later.  Until best
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Baby Making Day

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Well today our surrogate did the insemination, we will know by March 6th if she is pregnant. It’s going to be a long few weeks.  I know that things can go wrong anytime but I’m trying to think positive. Michael is more realistic and all he keeps saying is she could have a miscarriage but I don’t want to think that. Reality I do need to think that and get prepared if that does end up happening. Everything has happened so fast and I just have really high hopes it will all work out.  I will check in around March 6th or maybe before when we go to Disneyland with Michael’s siblings. Keeping my thoughts positive and really hoping she becomes pregnate by that time! 
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Magness Baby

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Wow it’s been 5 years and we are still trying for a baby! Well in the past 5 years we have been on a roller coaster of emotions! We went from thinking we were going to have a baby 3 months later to having friends/family offer to be our surrogate and last foster care and having a baby for a month but not being able to keep him.  Ups and down is the name of the game... and here we are at it again. The main purpose for this blog is for me to look back in a few years and see how much life has changed! I can see now that it really dose but at the same time it stays right where it should be. On one hand I’m always trying to lose weight (for no reason) and always trying to new diet/life style.  Michael has been by my side in everything and I could not be more then thankful for him to have suck with me through everything. I’m a super emotional person and he knows better then anymore how to deal with me. I love him so much!  So back to today’s world, baby talk! Let’s start from the beginnin
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